King of Illusions
by EchoKazul
Summary: If there's one thing that Leo's learning on this particular adventure, it's that appearances can be deceiving, but that can work to your advantage if you're clever. This is a Rise of the TMNT story, from the new series.
1. Uncanny Valley

**Author Notes:**

 _So I recently watched the first few early-released episodes for the new series, and I have to say that, while there are some things that threw me off, I'm looking forward to seeing where they go with this. It was especially strange seeing Leo act so flippantly, and I decided to see if I couldn't experiment with this new personality of his._

 _I've tried to keep with what lore has been established so far, but, obviously, this is still extremely early in the series, the show hadn't even been released at the the time of this writing, so there's a lot of guesswork._

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Uncanny Valley**

* * *

The first conscious thought that flittered through Leo's head was " _Ow_."

Oof, he hurt. His head hurt, his shell hurt, everything hurt. What bus had run him over, and had Raph beaten the driver up yet? What had happened? Where was he?

He lay there, stubbornly on the edge of consciousness, pondering the darkness and pain. Hm. Time to experiment. He wiggled his fingers slightly. Well, they moved. Good. Now for the toes... Ah. Success. Toe wigglage activated! Yay!

He didn't seem to be tied up or restrained in any way, and in fact seemed to be fairly comfortable, despite the soreness, so he PROBABLY wasn't captured or a prisoner. It was quiet and peaceful, which probably meant his brothers weren't immediately nearby either. That was troubling. If he had been injured somehow, he would expect Mikey to be petting his face while singing his favorite commercial jingles softly, Donnie playing the 'If I poke him here, will it have an effect?' game, and Raph wondering if he'd wake up faster if they shook him more.

Let's see here... What was the last thing he remembered...?

Laying there motionless with his eyes still closed, Leo tried to ignore the headache and think back.

He and his brothers had been searching for a magical artifact, some Eye of the Snake God or something. Leo wasn't sure what it did, exactly, but Baron Draxum was searching for it, so they had decided they had better find it first. It turned out this Eye thing had been in a cavern deep underground, inside an old ruined temple that had somehow found its way there by some forgotten civilization.

Oh, wait. Ha! That's right. Now he remembered. The Eye of the Snake God had been stuck behind a broken wall they hadn't been able to get past, and Donnie had wanted to use explosives to get to it. Fortunately, Leo had been able to talk them into pushing that back to 'Plan B', and instead went with 'Plan Let's Not Collapse A Cave On Top of Us'. Mikey had a big pack of bubblegum, and they chewed it up, stuck a big wad to the end of Donnie's staff, and stuck it through a crack to snag the tiny magic gem on the sticky pink mass. Donnie was horrified. It was great!

And then... then they had... oh yeah! Draxum showed up with a bunch of the oragami Foot, and they had fought. They were doing pretty well, actually, and he had pulled off some pretty cool moves. Until...

The cave in!

Leo began to remember!

There had been an explosion, though whether it had been Donnie or one of the Foot, he hadn't seen. But the cavern began to shake and big boulders began falling from the ceiling. He and his brothers had been running for the tunnel to try and escape, but he had been tackled by some of the paper Foot and knocked back. A giant stone pillar began to topple over and was about to crush him! He didn't have time to get out of the way, so, in desperation, he had grabbed his Ōdachi sword and quickly slashed a portal underneath himself, falling into it just before the rock slammed down on top of him.

But he hadn't been able to control where the exit point was, and he had unexpectedly found himself popping out in another gigantic cavern, a different cavern then the one with the ruined temple. He had noticed that this particular cavern had a ceiling covered in glowing mushrooms, lighting it up to almost daylight conditions, and seemed to be filled with forests and strange plants. Of course, he had this good of a view of the cavern because, unfortunately, the exit point of his portal had been near the ceiling, and so while he was admiring this beautiful, underground paradise, he also found himself plummeting through the air, screaming and flailing as he hurtled towards the green carpeted ground far below.

Wait. Not all green. Was that a swimming pool underneath him? No, that didn't make any sense. Wait... wait, wait. It was a basket! A huge swimming pool-sized woven basket! And it was filled almost to the brim with what looked like blue flowers that seemed to be growing abundantly in the fields all around them. There had to be thousands of flowers tossed in there.

Huh. What was that all about?

And then he had no time left to ponder the strange sight as he crashed into the unreasonably giant flower basket, sending flowers flying everywhere. Thankfully, they had cushioned his fall enough that he wasn't a splat on the cavern floor. But then there was a creak, and, brushing flowers off of his face, he had looked up to see that there was a wooden crane of some sort sitting on the edge of this basket structure, and it was now tipping over and falling right on top of...

Oh. Right. That's what happened.

Huh.

Well, with that mystery solved, now he just needed to figure where he was. Currently, there still was a disturbing lack of activity around him. It had to be obvious that he was awake now, wasn't it? It felt like somebody had tended his injuries. Who were they? Why were they in this cavern? And why all the flowers?

Leo finally decided the best course of action was to finish waking up, figure out who rescued him, and maybe apologize for ruining what had to be one of the largest flower arrangements in history.

His eyes blinked open, and he immediately winced at the light from the mushrooms above. He... was outside? Or whatever passed for outside in this cavern? He looked to his left, and then his right. He was laying back on his shell across some sort of raised wooden platform, up several feet off the ground. Blue flowers were everywhere around him, tucked in and arranged neatly around his form. In fact, he noticed that even the blanket covering him was actually a bunch of flowers woven together.

You know, this might be one of the weirder experiences in his life.

He wasn't going to end up sacrificed to anything, was he? Ugh. Where was his sword?

Leo winced a little, flowers sliding off as he propped himself up on his elbows, then he froze, his face going blank.

On the ground at the foot of the platform he was laying on, quietly knelt dozens of humanoid shaped turtles. Mutant turtles.

Mutant turtles with two red vertical stripes on their faces and blue bandannas tied around their heads.

Each one looked identical to the other.

Each one looked identical to HIM!

He reached back, rubbing the back of his aching head and wondering just how hard he hit it.

There had to be almost fifty perfect versions of himself out there, kneeling there in the grass and watching him silently with gleeful, expectant smiles on their faces.

So... he was laying on some sort of platform, surrounded by a crowd of creepy, smiling, so far silent clones of himself... That was a thing...

DEFINITELY ONE OF THE WEIRDER EXPERIENCES IN HIS LIFE!

This... they were just sitting there, staring at him! How long had they been sitting there? Were they watching him while he was unconscious?!

He sat there, wide eyed and staring right back at them. What did one even say in a situation like this?!

"Uh, hi? Good looking crowd this evening, I see." he finally nervously joked.

There was movement, and he looked over to see one of the Not-Actually-Leo standing up beside the foot of the platform and spread his arms joyously as he turned to the kneeling crowd. What stood there looked like exactly him, from the two toes and three fingers, to the blue markings on his shell, but the voice that came out to address the crowd startled Leo by its unexpectedness. It was high pitched and cute, like Mickey Mouse had just inhaled a bunch of helium.

"The King has awoken! Rejoice!"

"Yay!" Dozens of high pitched, Alvin and the Chipmunks style voice cried out joyfully, which honestly made things even more disconcerting and disturbing then they already had been.

He watched warily as the Leos around him rejoiced.

Oh, great. He somehow accidentally became the leader of a cult. Dad was going to be so disappointed in him. He had gotten this lecture already! There had been a rolled-up newspaper and everything! 'Blue! No!' he distinctly remembered hearing as he was swatted on the snout. 'No forming cults! Bad!'

"Uh... Yup. Yay." he agreed as he chuckled nervously, looking around, then muttered under his breath, "Please don't sacrifice me."

"Your Highness," his apparently new High Priest clone turned to him, still talking in chipmunk voice. "This is indeed a great and joyous day for us all! Long have we awaiting your coming! Though the years have been long, and our troubles great, never did we give up hope! Always, ever faithful and patient, we looked to the sky and gathered the blue flowers for you! And here you are at last to lead us!"

Leo blinked at him, inwardly scrambling to try and figure out this situation. Okay, if Ghostbusters had taught him anything, then if somebody asks you if you're a god, then you say YES, Ray! He cleared his throat. "Uh... Cool. Thanks?"

High Priest Leo-clone paused, then looked uncertain. "Are... are you alright? I believe you look uncomfortable." He turned around to look at the nearest fellow Leo-clone. "Is it my imagination, or does he look uncomfortable?"

"He looks uncomfortable." Acolyte Leo-clone agreed in that squeaky voice.

"But... why?" High Priest Leo-clone looked back towards Real Leo, perplexed and concerned. "We have done all we can to make you comfortable!"

"Our voices!" another Leo-clone, one that Leo decided to think of as 'Royal Advisor Leo', because hey, he apparently was king, darnit, and he could make such decisions. "Our voices are not familiar to him!"

"Oh! That is true!" Royal Scribe Leo-clone nodded in sage agreement.

"Hm." High Priest Leo-clone tapped his chin worriedly. "What is to be done about such a thing though?"

"What if..." Tax Accountant Leo-clone spoke up thoughtfully, "What if we worked in pairs of two? With one doing the voice?"

"Oh! That is brilliant!" High Priest Leo-clone clapped his hands in delight. "That should work! Let's go!"

Leo yelped, scrambling back and watching with wide eyes as half of the Leo-clones disappeared into a bright light, then merged and disappeared into the Leo-clone next to them.

Well, okay! Half of his new royal court just apparently absorbed the other half! That was a thing that could happen?

"There we go." And Leo felt creeped out goosebumps rise up on his arm as High-Priest Leo-clone, having just merged with Librarian Leo-clone, no longer sounded like he just inhaled a couple of party balloons, but instead now spoke in an eerily familiar voice. His own voice.

The now-perfect copy sounded pleased with himself as he turned. "Your highness, is this better?"

Leo gave a noncommittal whimper, sitting stiffly with his fists clenched at his hips, trying not to look freaked out but failing badly.

Lady-in-waiting Leo-clone frowned, then wrung his hands and looked around, distressed. "Oh no. He's worse!"

"Please, Your Majesty, tell us how we might put you at ease?" Acolyte Leo-clone begged of him, also now in his voice. "We wish only for your happiness and comfort!"

Leo took a deep, shaky breath, noticed and brushed a few blue flowers off of his thigh, slowly exhaled, then cleared his throat. "How about we start with WHY DO YOU ALL LOOK LIKE ME?!" His voice cracked as his panic broke through. He gestured towards them in agitation. "I mean, they say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but this is taking it too far!"

High Priest Leo-clone looked around at the rest of the royal court of Leo-clones, swallowed hard, then sighed and rubbed his arm dejectedly. "We... we had hoped that if we looked familiar to you, that if you saw a face like your own instead of strangers, then you'd feel a stronger desire to protect us." he admitted, hanging his head.

"Well, if you want to provoke a protective instinct in somebody, you're going about it all wrong. Right now, you're hitting the 'Uncanny Valley' zone. Hard." Leo crossed his arms, huffing. "Try something more 'Cute and Innocent' like, I dunno, fluffy kittens or something. Nobody wants a fluffy kitten to get hurt!"

There was a pause as all the Leo-clones looked at one another, then they all closed their eyes. Leo jumped as there were several pops of light all around him, and then suddenly he was surrounded by adorable fluffy kittens instead of creepy clones of himself. All the ones who disappeared earlier to change the voice of the Leo-clones were back as well, bringing the royal court back to full capacity, and they even weren't all exact replicas of each other this time. Apparently they must have had a greater knowledge of different cat breeds and colors then mutant turtle variations. Which, of course, made sense. There were a lot more cats out in the world then mutant turtles.

"Is this better then?" High Priest Kitten stood up on his hind legs to better peer up at him on the platform, now a fluffy grey tabby and once again speaking in the high-pitched helium voice.

Leo blinked at him, frowned, held up a finger and started to say something, paused again, then finally decided to just roll with it. "Ohmahgosh! You're freaking adorable!" He plopped down on his plastron and peered over the platform edge to see better. Curious and tempted by the fluffy fur, he reached down to poke the ball of fluff, but blinked in surprise when his hand just passed through the kitten's head as if there were nothing there but air.

He lifted up his hand and stared at it, wiggling the fingers that had just passed through what looked like a solid kitten. Oh. Great. Now his cult was made up of ghosts?!

"Oh! My apologies, Your Majesty!" High Priest Ghost-Kitten sputtered. "I-I didn't realized you'd actually try to... Um... this... this is just an illusion."

Leo peered over the edge of the platform again and narrowed his eyes suspiciously at the very-real looking tabby. "What do you really look like, then?"

High Priest Illusionary-kitten sighed, then, in a flash of light, suddenly there was a tiny little fairy, dressed in an outfit of leaves with butterfly wings, no bigger then a bumblebee. "We... we look like this, Your Highness. We're pixies."

Leo studied the little pixie for a moment, then carefully, gently, reached out and poked him.

Okay, he was real.

High Priest Pixie flew up and settled on his outstretched finger, sitting down and letting his wings droop. "I apologize if we messed up our introduction. It truly was our intention to make you feel at ease."

"It's... okay. I'm guessing that you guys were the ones who set up the giant flower pit, so that means your flower obsessions saved my life and everything." Leo looked around at all the kittens now poofing into pixie form, then looked back down at his High Priest, raising a red-striped eyeridge. "So... if I'm understanding this correctly, I'm your king now?"

High Priest Pixie nodded enthusiastically.

"Cool." Leo carefully stood up, still balancing a pixie on one finger. He put his free hand on his hip imperiously. "Then my first decree is that you guys tell me what the heck is going on here!"

His stomach rumbled a little.

"... over a feast!" He amended quickly. "I wish to hear the tale over a feast!"

"Yay!" the pixies all cheered happily. "Cheers for the King!"

* * *

It took a depressingly short amount of time to put together a pixie feast. Leo found himself sitting on the ground, surrounded by happily feasting pixies while he stared dejectedly at a plate heaped with blue flowers.

He glanced at his Head Cook Pixie. "I don't suppose you have pizza? Or a hamburger or something?"

Head Cook Pixie looked up from where he was happily munching on his flower. He looked thoughtful for a moment. "If you want, I can make it LOOK like a pizza or hamburger, Your Highness."

"Uh, no. That's okay. Thanks, though." Leo sighed, leaning back. He really need to find his sword and get out of here. Not only was he concerned about his brothers, but he was going to starve to death down here, apparently. But first, pixie business. "So... tell me, why do you want a turtle for a king anyways?" he wondered, picking up a flower and halfheartedly chewing on it.

"Oh! That's a story!" another pixie flew up, one that Leo had mentally designated as the Royal Stablekeeper Pixie earlier, but now decided to amend to the more appropriate title of Royal Historian Pixie. He perched politely on the edge of Leo's shell on his shoulder. He cleared his throat and began.

"You see, many, many, MANY years ago, we once roamed the lands above. It was our home, and we were happy up there. But then, one day, we got trapped down here, and we couldn't figure out how to escape. But there was a pixie among us who was very wise, and had a dream of the future."

"That was me!" Okay, so apparently he now had a Royal Soothsayer Pixie. She was sitting next to the Royal Blacksmith Pixie, and waving wildly at him. He waved back politely, then picked up another flower and decided to see if just eating the flower part and not the stem would make it less bitter.

"The dream foretold that one day, if we offered a flower in prayer, then a great hero, powerful, brave, and strong, would appear and lead us out of this cavern prison and out to paradise up on the surface." Historian Pixie continued.

'A' flower? As in singular? Man, these guys were overachievers. Still, they did save his life by their enthusiasm for flower offerings. Leo tapped his chin with a flower stem thoughtfully as he chewed. "I could probably pull something like that off for you. I need my sword first, though." He swallowed, making a face at the taste. Okay, these flowers weren't going to work out. "You guys haven't seen it, have you? I lost it when I fell."

The pixies looked at one another.

"No, we haven't seen any swords, my King." Acolyte Pixie frowned. "When you fell out of the sky, it startled us so badly that we all dove for cover and hid! We didn't see a sword falling."

"It must have landed in the forest." Tax Accountant Pixie whispered in horror.

All the pixies went silent, shuddering.

"Uh... I take it that's... bad." Leo looked around at them.

"There's a terrible monster that's appeared recently. It roams the woods around us, and hunts us if we wander too close! We dare not go out there, least we be devoured." Head Cook Pixie whimpered, flying up press against his neck and hide behind one of his bandana tails. "A great and giant bird that can magically grow even larger, with the strength of a god, and talons and beak like weapons that can pierce even the most carefully crafted armor! It is horrible and unnatural, with eyes of fire red and skin melting off of its face."

"When it hunts us, it screeching out curses in the language of the demons!" High Priest Pixie added as he hid under Leo's hand, trembling.

"Hm." Leo frowned. That didn't sound good. Hopefully he wasn't getting into something over his head here. He was weaponless!

"That... that is why we were gathering so many flowers, actually." Historian Pixie admitted. "We were getting desperate! If one flower was supposed to summon our new leader and hero, then a bunch of flowers would work even better, right?"

"That was my idea too." Soothsayer Pixie said proudly.

"We wove and wove and finally made the biggest basket in the world!" Historian Pixie explained. "And then we gathered flowers to put in it. Day and night, we gathered flowers and piled them in the basket, never stopping, because eventually it would have to work, right?"

"It took weeks and weeks, but it worked! Just like I knew it would! You came out of the sky and landed among our flowers!" High Priest Pixie hugged Leo's finger joyfully. "Now you'll save us from that monster and lead us out to paradise!"

"Huh. Well... that explains a lot, actually." Leo nodded, then leaned back and sighed as he pondered this strange turn of events. It sounded like he was going to have to face this monster if he was going to find his sword. And his brothers. And his way home.

His stomach growled.

And some food.

Hopefully this wouldn't take too long.


	2. All Hail the King

**Author Note:**

 _So, just a little warning, at one point, Leo's going to use a little harsher language in this chapter. While previous Leos probably never would, I could see 2k18 Leo being cheeky enough to swear if it applied to the 'Rule of Cool'_.

* * *

Mikey looked forlorn, seated with his knees drawn up while tracing the drawings on his kneepads miserably. "I miss Leo." he finally sighed as he tipped over from where he was seated to lean against Raph's arm, taking comfort in the physical presence of his largest older brother

"Aw, don't worry Mikey." Raph, also seated with his shell leaning back against the wall, lifted an arm to pat him gently on the head. "We saw the glowy blue before the pillar crashed on him. I'm sure Leo's been portaled away safe and sound, and he's trying to find his way back to us. We're going to see him falling screaming out of a portal in the sky any moment now. You'll see."

"Yeah... I know." Mikey nodded glumly, obviously appreciative of the headpats. "It's just that... y'know... I could really use a witty one liner about this situation to cheer me up, and Donnie hasn't come up with any good ones yet."

"Hey!" Donnie was obviously offended, sitting on the other side of Raph with his arms crossed. "I came up with at least nine perfectly acceptable witty quips during that battle and the aftermath!"

"Eh." Raph thought about it for a moment, then shrugged and lifted a hand, wobbling it from side to side. "I'd rate them four out of ten. Maybe."

"Oh, come on." Donnie protested, offended. "That quip about the paper origami ninja I was fighting being a 'tearable' warrior was worth at LEAST a nine!"

"I appreciated the effort, Dee." Mikey sighed.

"Arghbaraghegithargh!" April growled and snarled as she viciously bit at the plant-like material that formed a cage around her and the three remaining turtle brothers, grinding her teeth into the wood-like vines and pulling at them to no avail.

She and the three turtle brothers were all together and trapped in large teardrop shaped prison made up of vines and resilient plant material that dangled from a jutting support beam out of one of the nearby ruined stone buildings. They were still underground in an uncollapsed section of the massive cavern, in the courtyard of the large, abandoned city surrounded by wide cobblestone streets and hundreds of two story buildings. Around them mulled a large group of origami ninja, while off to the side, Baron Draxum quietly conferred with the two Foot soldiers, admiring the rainbow-colored gem he held in one hand as he did so.

"Hey! Hey! You! Yeah, you! You scrawny, mange-infected chimchar wannabe!" April stopped chewing on the cage bars to point and rage at the small Foot Lieutenant. "You're doing your cosplay wrong! The fire's supposed to be on your butt, not your head! Though, with a face like that, it's easy to see how you got confused!"

Donnie tapped his chin thoughtfully, then shrugged."Eh... a little rambling, but you managed to twist it into a 'buttface' insult at the end. I'll give it a 6 out of 10."

"Ooh, add a point for pokemon references!" Mikey perked up. "I love pokemon!"

The tiny ape-like Foot Lieutenant glanced in her direction, looking a little confused.

"Gotta problem with that?!" April snarled, hackles raised. "Then come over here and we'll settle this mano a mano! Right here, right now! Come at me bro!"

The Foot Lieutenant snorted, then turned back to the conversation with Baron Draxum.

"Well, phooey." April frowned, slumping down and poking the vine-like bars of the cage that held them forlornly. "I'm out of ideas."

"They have the advantage of numbers, they possess Eye of the Serpent God, and we're in a cage." Donnie agreed. "Guys... we just might be in a spot of trouble."

"So now what do we do?" Mikey asked, looking up at Raph for answers.

"Like the patient leopard, we wait." Raph narrowed his eyes determinedly, dangerously. "We watch our prey, and wait for the perfect opportunity to make our move. At that precise moment, and only then, will we move in for the kill like the master hunters that we are!"

"In other words, he has no idea." Donnie sounded bored.

"Hey, don't forget that Leo is still out there somewhere." April moved over to plop down next to Mikey, patting him on the shoulder. "He's not going to leave us out in the lurch."

"That's right. This is Leo we're talking about." Raph put a comforting hand on his youngest brother's rigid shell. He steeled his jaw firmly, and looked up resolutely, clutching his other fist tightly against his chest in a noble, confident pose. "And if I know our brother, then he's probably shadowing us right now, scheming up some elaborate plan to sneak in and free us all as we speak."

"That's right!" April agreed, grinning evilly as she imagined the eventual comeuppance to be meted out, and punched the palm of her hand gleefully. "Draxum and his goons will never see him coming until it's too late!"

"You think so?" Mikey perked up hopefully. "We haven't seen any sign of him yet."

"Leo may be a lot of things, but he's not stupid." Donnie scoffed. "With this many opponents, he's going to have to play this one smart and stealthy. He's not going to just jump out in the open waving his arms and yelling..."

"HEY GUYS!" an all-to-familiar voice called out to them cheerfully from further up the street of the old ruined city. "There you are!"

Everybody, turtles, human, and enemies alike, froze at the voice, conversation stopping as if there were a needle scratch. Then, as one, they looked over to see Leonardo right in the middle of the street a ways down, just in front of a large stone building. His ōdachi was resting easily on one shoulder and a crooked, confident grin graced his face.

"How's it going?" he asked casually, rocking on his feet.

"Leo!" Mikey chirped happily, sitting up.

Donnie's eyelid twitched slightly, then turned and pointed at Draxum and the Foot. "Dibs! I call dibs on strangling my brother."

Baron Draxum stood up gracefully, uncoiling like a serpent as he watched the unexpected arrival. "Ah. The forth turtle finally shows himself." he observed in a smooth baritone. "And here I was afraid my collection would be incomplete."

"Hoo boy, you guys were NOT easy to find!" Leo ignored the villain as he clicked his tongue and swung his sword down to stick it in the ground, leaning on it while he shook his head. "It took me, like, hours of searching and portaling all over the place. There are waaay too many caverns in this area, let me tell you, and I was beginning to get a little worried that you guys might've gotten yourself into some trouble or something."

"Uh, Leo... In case you haven't noticed the large army surrounding us..." Raph pointed out the obvious.

"Have you come to surrender yourself then, turtle?" Draxum watched him disdainfully. "If so, then you have shown yourself to possess more good sense then your siblings."

"What?" Leo raised an eyeridge, then scoffed, waving a hand as if dismissing the very idea. "Oh, no! Of course not! No, I'm just here to collect my brothers, April, and that magic rainbow marble that you're holding. I'll even let you and your goons walk away if you play nice."

Draxum blinked, then looked down at his two Foot goons with eyebrows raised, before looking back up at the brash young turtle. "I believe you don't fully understand the situation you find yourself in, turtle."

The tiny Foot Lieutenant snickered, then spread his hands. As if on command, the army of origami ninjas spread out, crouching as they readied to attack.

Leo eyed them with a smirk, still leaning on his sword and seemingly unconcerned. "Oh... that's cute. Should I feel threatened?"

"Uh... Leo?" Donnie called out, sounding a little annoyed. "When you portaled out earlier to escape the cave in, you didn't happen to hit your head or anything when you fell out the other side, did you?"

"Yes. Yes I did! Hard!" Leo answered cheerfully. "But that's not important right now." He stood up and grabbed his sword handle, flipping it up and spinning it expertly. "What's important is that I went on a journey, my brothers." He sheathed the sword in one fluid motion. "A magical journey full of wonder and adventure and self discovery, where I discovered my true destiny in this life. I learned of my true calling, of who I was really meant to be!"

"Oh really..." Baron Draxum did not sound impressed by this. "And who are you supposed to be, little turtle?"

A grin slowly crept its way across Leo's face, his head slightly lowered so his eyes remained hidden by the shadows of his brow. "Oh? Who am I? Did... did you really just ask that?" The grin continued growing ever wider and more amused. "You really, really want to know who I am?" Then he shifted slightly to look up at them all, snickering, before standing straight and throwing his arms wide open.

 **BOOM!**

Out of seemingly nowhere, a GIGANTIC fifty-foot tall blue scaled dragon slammed onto the building behind him with enough force to rattle all the loose rocks around them and send a shockwave of air and debris rippling through the streets. It's razor sharp claws dug into the ancient stone of the structure, sending dust and small pebbles tumbling down, and the very building itself seemed to shudder and groan under the weight. It's colossal leathery wingspan was so wide that it covered several of the ruined cities blocks in shade, before it folded them up against its muscled body as it perched.

Leo's gleeful laugh was almost maniacal as he stood just under the behemoth's shadow. "You're looking at the King of Dragons, motherfuckers!"

The massive dragon leaned down its long, solid neck, holding an imposing head the size of a minivan almost protectively over Leo as it turned its head to let out a mighty roar that blasted and echoed through the whole cavern, almost deafening them all while fully displaying rows of bright white teeth the length of a human arm.

As the echoes of the mighty roar faded away, Leo thumbed up towards him casually. "This is my Royal Bodyguard, by the way. He says hi."

Even Baron Draxum could only make a confused, uncharacteristically small squeak as he stared, his finger withering.

"You know," Leo kept his arms spread wide like a ringmaster proudly displaying his greatest act as he began to confidently stroll forward. After only a few steps, two more dragons, smaller then the first but each still the size of a city bus, dropped out of the darkness on either side of him, landing in perfect unison with more earth shuddering weight. They both folded their wings and crouched respectfully to bow to their king as he walked between them, "I was really kinda hoping that you'd ask the classic bad guy 'Oh, you and what army?' line, because that would've been _AWESOME_ to just point up and say, 'Oh, them'." He pointed up.

And they all looked up to see a dozen more dragon, each at least thirty feet in length, flying up near the ceiling of the vast underground cavern. A few of them let jets of searing flame stream from gaping maws, lighting up the shadows with orange sparks and flames.

Suddenly two of them broke formation, turned and dove through the air, and then BOOM! Two more dragons landed on either sides of the street in perfect imitation of thefirst two, as they too folded their wings and lowered their heads in a bow as Leo continued walking.

Leo looked every inch the master of the catwalk he now strode down, chuckling with amusement. "Villains now a days, they can't even be bothered to follow script, you know? Even when you try to spoon feed it them. I suppose that's the quality you can expect these days. Le sigh." he gave a heavy mock sigh.

Another two dragons dropped out of the sky to land on either side of their king, continuing the perfect line as they also bowed low.

Leo finally stopped, now standing right up in Draxum's face, only a few inches from the evil genius. He grinned up at him cheekily. "Hi."

Draxum frowned down at him, his face tight and not saying a word. The two Foot soldiers cowered behind him, staring up at the dragons swarming around them in the air with wide eyes, while the origami soldiers stood by mindlessly.

"Soooo..." Leo coughed and held up a hand palm up, wiggling his three fingers in expectation. "My brothers, April, and the magic gem you're holding there? In exchange for you just walking away? You have to admit, that's a preeetty generous offer..."

Draxum's eyes narrowed, his jaw clenching tighter in anger.

Leo sighed and folded his arms, shaking his head in weary disappointment as if he were dealing with a petulant, disobedient child. "I mean, you COULD refuse, of course, but then things will get so messy, and gross, and Mikey... You've met my brother Mikey, right? He's the one in the orange right over there in the cage? Hey Mikey!" Leo waved cheerfully in the direction of his brothers.

"Hi Leo!" Mikey returned the wave enthusiastically through the vine bars of the cage.

"Yeah, Mikey's a good kid." Leo chuckled, and turned back to the conversation. "Anyways, Mikey is a little on the sensitive side, y'know, and once you get dragons going... Hoo boy... I really don't want Mikey to watch them playing tug of war with your entrails. Dragons will be dragons after all." He chuckled, then thought for a moment and shrugged. "Plus, y'know, there's that whole thing where I'll probably feel kinda bad about it, and I'll have to deal with my conscience being a little conflicted as I try to reconcile the bloodbath with my heroic ideals. I mean, yeah, eventually I'll get over it, but who wants to go through all that, am I right?" Leo ribbed Draxum playfully with a wink.

"You think you've won?" Draxum hissed angrily.

"Uh... yeah?" Leo pretended to ponder the question for only a second before answering. He gave Draxum a look. "You have an army of paper people. I have an army of fire breathing dragons. Heck, all I'd need is just Leo Jr back there," he gestured towards his Royal Bodyguard, who had followed him closely and was now towering over all of them, "to accidentally _sneeze_ and I'd win." He sat back on his heels and folded his arms, watching Draxum with an amused smirk. "The way I see it, there's only two outcomes of this. First one is I get my family and that magic little gem you're holding there, and you and your army walk away unharmed. The other scenario is that I get my family and that little magic gem thing, and we get to watch kinda squicked out as my royal subjects playfully toss your mangled corpses around. Dragons can kinda be like cats sometimes in that regard." Leo made a grossed out face and shuddered as he thought about it.

Draxum was quiet for a long moment, sharply studying Leo through narrowed eyes.

Leo didn't waver an inch as he solidly met his gaze without blinking, slowly grinning impishly. It was clear that he knew he held all the cards in this situation, and reveled in the fact.

Never breaking eye contact, Draxum finally reached out and dropped the Eye of the Serpent God into Leo's waiting hand.

Leo grinned, closing his fingers around it and pulling it close. "And my bros?"

Draxum lifted a hand, and the vines quickly melted away, depositing the other three turtles and their human friend gently on the cobbled street. They looked at each other, a little bewildered, grabbed their gear which was laying in a pile off to the side, then quickly shuffled over to stand by Leo, watching the Origami soldiers around them warily as they passed them by.

Donnie hugged his staff and gave it a quick peck. "Oh baby, I missed you!" he whispered to it as they stood behind Leo.

Leo gave a quick glance over his family, then, satisfied that they were all accounted for and unharmed, he grinned up at Draxum. "Well, that's everything, I guess. It was a pleasure doing business with you."

"This isn't over, turtles." Draxum hissed.

"Whatever." Leo shrugged casually, examining his nails, then gestured with a slight nod of his head towards the towering dragons around them as if proving his point. "It's not like you're a threat."

Draxum tensed up angrily, but didn't say a word. Finally he took a step back. "We will go then."

Leo watched him, looking bored. "Of course. That was the deal, after all." He glanced upwards towards the dragons up above, who were circling lower now, and then back towards the dragons behind him, who had broken their formation of bowing to create a straight path and were now crowding behind him, each eyeing the army of ninja eagerly. "I'd hurry if I were you, though. There's only so long that I can keep them from playing with such tempting looking little toys."

Draxun's nostrils flared, but he turned and gestured for his own followers to retreat. They moved towards the cavern exit at a deliberate and leisurely pace.

Overhead, the gigantic blue dragon let out another earth shaking roar.

Draxum and his minions broke out into a hurried sprint, which then devolved into a flat out terrified run. They very quickly disappeared down the street into the darkness.

There was a long moment of silence, with Leo standing there with his arms crossed, smirking, and his brothers and April looking completely bewildered, as if they were still trying to process what had just happened.

"Uh... Leo?" Raph finally ventured, looking straight up to the dragon towering over them hesitantly.

"Shhshhshhshhshhhhhh." Leo held up a hand, shushing him.

Raph shushed, blinking in confusion.

Leo tilted his head, obviously listening. "You think they're gone?"

April scoffed. "At the pace they were running? Heck, yeah, they're probably in Jersey by now!"

Leo paused for a moment, then a snicker escaped, which quickly devolved into rolling laughter that doubled him over. "That... was... _amazing_!" he gasped, tears starting to stream down his face he was laughing so hard. He turned to his brothers in disbelief. "Oh my gosh! Did you see them run?! That has to be one of the greatest things I've ever participated in in my entire life!"

And suddenly, to the utter bewilderment of the already completely confused turtles and April, all around them the dragons suddenly dissipated, each one breaking up into several tiny balls of light that quickly streamed through the air towards Leo, until he was covered in a swarm of them.

"We did well?!" a tiny, high pitched voice asked Leo excitedly.

"You guys absolutely NAILED it!" Leo cheered the lights, and held up the hand not holding the magic gemstone. "High three!"

Two of the tiny lights merged together to form a floating, three fingered hand that gleefully squealed as it gave Leo a high three.

"Waitwaitwait. Before ANYTHING ELSE HAPPENS!" Donnie had had enough of this nonsense, and stomped over to grab Leo by the shoulders, shaking him and scattering the little balls of light like fireflies. "Explanation time is now!"

Leo held out a hand, and a tiny pixie landed on, settling down to sit crosslegged in his palm. "These guys are my pixie posse." he explained. "I sorta fell in with their crowd when I was escaping earlier, and they adopted me as their king!" He held the tiny pixie up for the others to see. "This is my High Priest."

Donnie stared at him, blinked, then took a step back and sighed, face palming. "Leo has a high priest." he muttered to himself. "This isn't going to end well."

"They're adorable!" Mikey squealed in delight.

"And you met them after falling through your portal?" Raph asked, crouched down and obviously fascinated by the tiny creatures.

"We've been waiting for our King to come rescue us for a long time!" the little High Priest informed him eagerly, hugging Leo's thumb. "He saved us from the Beast of the Woods and is leading us up back to the surface! He's everything that we hoped for!"

"You guys hear that?" Leo asked smugly. "I'm awesome."

"Leo, you went out and became the head of a monarchy?!" Donnie glared at him. "I thought Dad talked to you about that!"

"Hey, that lecture was about becoming a cult leader!" Leo said defensively. "And, for your information, being King of the Pixies not so much as being in charge of an actually functioning government, but more like... I dunno... running a preschool filled with children who unintentionally act like the twins from The Shining."

"So these little guys turned into those giant dragons we saw?" Raph asked, hopefully holding out a finger just like Leo. He gave a grin of absolute delight as, after a quick glance at Leo for approval, another little pixie flew up and perched on it, preening a little.

"Sort of?" Leo shrugged. "That was actually all just a big illusion. These guys are experts at that. They can work together to create illusions of sight, sound, smell, even touch."

"Wait. So... the dragons weren't actually real?" Donnie looked up from where he was scanning a pixie with his staff.

"Nope!" Leo said cheerfully.

"We're not actually any good at fighting or anything." the Royal Shipwright explained, perched crosslegged on the top of Donnie's screen. "We can only fool people's senses and make them believe that something is different then it actually is."

"So if Draxum had called your bluff..."

"Then, MAN, would I have been in trouble." Leo laughed, and then shrugged, grinning and looking at the pixies fondly. "But, I've been trying to teach these guys that they can use their illusions to protect themselves from predators and stuff. When we finally found you guys, it was the perfect scenario to show them just how powerful mere illusions could be with a bit of proper acting." He glanced at the pixies. "Remember, you guys. Appearances are nine tenths of the law. If they think you're a dragon, then it's as good as if you actually were ones, as long as you can keep up the pretense."

"Consider the lesson learned, Your Majesty!" The Royal Head of Guard gleefully twirled around. "If we ever run into another monster like the Beast of the Woods, we'll be prepared next time, thanks to you!"

"The Beast of the Woods?" April glanced up at him curiously.

"It was terrible!" the Royal Butler wailed from where she sat on Mikey's shell. "It would chase us through the trees and make demonic noises, with giant claws and a razor-sharp beak with flesh dangling off of it!"

"That was one reason we were so desperate to find our King!" the High Priest patted Leo's thumb. "We knew he'd be strong enough to protect us! And he was! It never stood a chance against his strength!"

Leo rubbed the back of his head. "Yeeeaaahh... it turned out to be a turkey."

"A turkey. Really?" April raised an eyebrow. "Like the Thanksgiving bird? This far underground?"

"Hey, turkeys can be intimidating when you're normal sized. I can't imagine how they look when you're only two inches tall and resemble a bug." Leo said, slightly on the defensive side. "I noticed a large crack in the ceiling of the cavern that seemed to up a long ways. The best I can figure, some turkeys managed to Plinko their way down that into that cavern at some point and got trapped? Maybe that's how the pixies got trapped down there as well."

"So, oh Fearless One, you defeated a turkey on behalf of your royal subjects?" Donnie asked dryly.

"Eheh..." Leo rubbed the back of his head.

_*About an hour ago in the Forest*_

The pixies were all seated on a branch of a mushroom tree, cheering loudly as Leo ran in circles, his arms flailing in panic as he tried to shake off the giant, angry ball of fluffed up brown feathers and beating wings. "AGH! IT'S ON MY FACE! IT'S ON MY FACE! OH GOD, IT'S PECKING ME! GET IT OFF!"

_*Back to Present*_

"I handled it with my usual graceful skill, and cunning, of course. It was only a turkey, after all." Leo said smoothly. "Cooked it and ate it afterward too after I found my sword, the asshole bird." he grumbled under his breath.

Raph perked up and turned his full attention on Leo, looking hopeful.

"Yes, Raph, I brought you the leftovers." Leo walked over to pick up a roughly woven bag he had left by the side of a building earlier and handed it to his large brother.

Raph eagerly opened the bag and peered in. "Yesssss! You even saved me the drumsticks!" He gleefully pulled out a large, slightly charbroiled turkey leg.

"Of course I did! I knew they were your favorite." Leo grinned at him, then unsheathed his sword. "Now then, if I recall correctly, my royal subjects asked their king to take them back up to the surface, and, being the benevolent and dutiful sovereign that I am, I feel honor bound to fulfill my royal duties."

"Oh, god, his ego was already inflated as it was, and then this happens?!" April realized with horror.

"I promised my peoples a paradise to live in, and a paradise I will deliver!" Leo vowed.

"Yay!" the pixies all cheered excitedly.

"Uh... Leo... is this a good idea?" Mikey asked, a little concerned. "They were having trouble with a turkey. There's a lot more dangerous things up on the surface. Like cats. Or dogs. Or humans."

"Oh, it's okay." Leo didn't look worried as he swung his sword around experimentally in a few practice arcs. "I've been teaching them a few tricks to scare off any potential threats."

"Well, this is going to end well." Donnie dryly observed.

* * *

 **A few months later...**

* * *

The four turtle brothers were seated on the floor around Splinters armchair, eating pizza and watching the TV show projected on the wall of the Lair.

"And next time on The Strange, the Spooky, and Supernatural, we visit the New York Botanical Gardens, where our hosts have the most terrifying encounter of their lives!" the announcer blared out dramatically.

"Oooooh. Spooky!" Raph rolled his eyes sarcastically as he popped open a can of orange soda. "A garden! How terrifying! What, is the ghost of a gardener pulling weeds?" he scoffed, before chugging his drink.

"Weren't we just at the Botanical Gardens recently for some reason?" Mikey wondered as he pulled off a pepperoni and popped it in his mouth.

The preview on screen showed the human hosts of the show standing stock still in abject terror as they were surrounded by dozens of eerily smiling clones of themselves.

"What the hell is going on, Nathan?" one of the hosts whimpered.

The clones all began chanting as one in unnaturally high-pitched voices, "King Leonardo says you can come play with us! Forever and ever and ever!"

And then there was a lot of terrified screaming and an excellent close up of the grass as the cameracrew knocked over their camera in their frenzied flight.

The four turtles froze. Raph was midchug and ended up choking on his drink, so Mikey had to pound him on his shell.

"And just let me chalk up another checkmark in the 'Donnie Called This' column." Donnie pulled up the screen and started pushing buttons on his gauntlet.

Leo sniffed and wiped an imaginary tear away. "I'm so proud of them."

In his chair, Splinter was silent for a second, then slowly turned. "Blue..."

 _Thwap!_

A rolled up newspaper smacked Leo on the snout.

Leo rubbed his nose and grumbled. "In my defense, it wasn't a cult this time..."

* * *

 **Author Notes:**

 _ _Leo made them watch a lot of horror movies to give them ideas.__

 _Other Pixie Court's Line of Defense according to Leo:_

 _If they're attacked by a bird: Turn into a cat  
Attacked by a cat: Turn into a Dog  
Chased by a dog: Turn into an old lady carrying a vacuum cleaner_


End file.
